Writing is an adventure. To begin with, it is a toy and an amusement. Then it becomes a mistress, then it becomes a master, then it becomes a tyrant. The last phase is that just as you are about to be reconciled to your servitude, you kill the monster and fling him to the public.

— Winston Churchill

I love You, Too.

I tell my son I love him so many times each day the words simply whisper across his ears without regard, but in the quiet moments before he falls asleep is when the emotion seems to resonate.  I’ll breath, “Mommy loves you more than the moon and all the stars in the sky,” and in the soft voice of a child ready to embrace a dream he’ll exhale the precious reward, “I know, Mommy.”

As he’s matured there have been moments when I wanted him to respond with his own, “I love you, too.”  I’ve realized though it’s not the affirmation of his love for me that tucks me in at night; it really is the fact that he knows he is loved… I know, Mommy.  And his refusal to play the game makes the moments dazzling when, in the  middle of the day, for no apparent reason, he’ll throw his arms around me and say, “Mommy, I love you!”

During the last year I’ve spent too much time thinking about the meaning of love and the different types of love.  I’m guilty of the requisite volley when someone makes a declaration and I’ve chuckled at my husband when he’s proclaimed at the end of a telephone conversation that he loves me, too…when I hadn’t yet said the first part. We’re so used to ending calls with testaments of emotion, we don’t even hear them anymore.

I wonder what would happen if instead of parroting the sentiment with family and friends, I simply started saying, I know.

Is the goal of telling someone you love him or her a reciprocal reaction, or is your intent to provide a stand-alone gift that you bequeath freely and without expectation?

How would you feel if your spouse, child, sister or friend simply said, I know.

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8 comments to I love You, Too.

  • Jan

    My kids tell me all the time, “I love you!” And when I tell them, they say, “I love you, too, Mom!” Without fail. This is absolutely the best thing about being a parent as far as I’m concerned.

    Beloved is a little different. He doesn’t say “I love you” very often. When I tell him “I love you” he says “I know” – some times he tells me “I love you, too” but not always. Funny thing is, I don’t say “I love you” very often to him; we just don’t need to. We know.
    Jan´s last blog ..Breakfast at Grandma’s My ComLuv Profile

  • Love this post! My wife is from Germany, and didn’t watch Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back (I know, right?). The very first time she said, “I love you,” I turned, looked her right in the eye with my best Han Solo, and said:

    “I know.”

    Broke. Her. Heart. But then we watched Star Wars. :)
    goodfather´s last blog ..Monday morning My ComLuv Profile

  • I tell my older kids that I love them pretty much every time I talk to them on the phone…sometimes they say it first and sometimes I do…of course I tell my little’s that I love them many times in the day and they will say things like “I know” or “I’m glad”…they will also tell me this at random times also…When I tell people that I love them I don’t think I am necessarily expecting them to say it right back to me but it sure is nice to hear it. XX
    Lori´s last blog ..My Youngest Son My ComLuv Profile

  • My biggest concern for my daughter is that she know she is loved. Having cancer and toddler, I’ve spent some time worrying about what will happen to her, and her emotional wellbeing if I don’t beat the cancer. Of course I have every intention of beating cancer, but it’s natural to have those thoughts. Her verbal skills are nowhere near ready to comprehend and say “I know,” but I would be so happy to hear that response from her.
    Judy Schwartz Haley | CoffeeJitters.Net´s last blog ..Dear Gem – Month 20 My ComLuv Profile

  • Be

    If it is there it goes without saying. Grok?

  • Every night before bed I tell my kids I love them, I will admit, it is routine. My 9 year old son, NEVER says it back but frequently say “mom, I know, why do you have to tell me all the time?” and I always reply “because I just do not want you to ever forget!”
    Amy @ Six Flower Mom´s last blog ..What’s In A Name My ComLuv Profile

  • Joaquim Sanders

    My family loved me… I know it, but they never told me “I Love you” or kissed me! I understand why they did it. The best I love you I had in my life was when Aaron broke his leg and was in pain in the hospital bed waiting to be treated. I told him: I love you Aaron and he replied in his little crying voice: I love you too daddy!

    To your point… the “I love you” shouldn’t be a routine.

    By the way…. glad to see you back :)

  • I guess it depends on how the “I know.” is said. Can be sweet or can be kinda a let down. Now the Han Solo “I know.” is sweet and heartbreaking and I have to admit, the first time I heard it I thought” Well that is kinda smug of him… oh wait, I’m watching a movie, no one says that in real life ;)

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